5 days left...

Today I'm driving down to pick up my dress for my brother's wedding. I'll be spending tonight at my Grandparents. I haven't seen them for a while so I'm really looking forward to spending some time there.

I don't know how people can stand being away from their "significant others." I have felt like the summer and being apart has been tearing me up inside. But maybe I'm just blowing everything out of proportion...

6 days left...

I had an emotional breakdown yesterday. Everything is catching up to me and I have a lot of pent up emotions. I was glad that I had my Daddy to talk to and was able to talk to Brandon after he got off work. It is amazing to have these two strong men in my life that I can rely on when I'm going through tough times. By the time I got calmed down and everything it was time for bed and I didn't blog.

It is really hard these last few days. I'm looking forward to seeing Brandon and spending time with him. I'm also looking forward to feeling his arms around me once again. The time apart has been way too long. I can't remember his arms around me or feel his kiss on my forehead any more.

Brandon has a hard time surprising me. Today, while skyping, he showed me the surprise that he has been working on to give me in August.

8 days left...

I've had a really busy day so far. I woke up and did some chores around Grandma's house. I vacuumed, cleaned the bathroom, picked fruit to take home, watered the yard, and helped Grandma wash the bedding and make the beds. Then I packed up my car after lunch and filled up my gas tank. Then I drove to the cemetery. I had decided to go visit Grandpa's grave. Grandma is moving and this might be the last time that I head out in that direction for a long time. One look at Grandpa's gravestone brought tears to my eyes that spilled out and ran down my cheeks. I stood there talking to God for a while and thinking about memories that I have of my Grandpa. Then I got into my car and drove home. It feels good to be home. I'm really glad that I had the opportunity to go keep Grandma company and help her out. Even though I had to give up some things, I will never regret giving my time to her. It was a huge blessing to me as well as to Grandma.

I think I may be the luckiest girl alive...

9 days left...

I feel a lot better today. I figured out some of the stuff that was causing my bad mood yesterday and I'm one step closer to dealing with it. Today is good. I feel very happy skyping with Brandon right now and knowing that he is there for me every day (both the good and the bad days.)

I'm going home tomorrow. Grandma is feeling much better and I'm so ready to see my family again. God is good like always and I know that he will help me through these last few days left.

My feet are happy...

10 days left...

There are some days that I wish I could do over again. Today was one of them. I was really bummed out today, you could call it depressed. Nothing Brandon said could bring me out of it. I haven't been this bummed for a really long time. Finally the depression lifted when I read my Bible in the late afternoon. I feel bad because I know that it hurt Brandon to see me so down in the dumps. But that's what love is, being there all the time even through the bad.

Lesson: Read your Bible, it prevents and solves a lot of issues.

11 days left...

Grandma had a good day today, the best one yet! That makes my day good. I didn't do much today but I did finish reading Mary Higgins Clark "Second Time Around." I dozed off a little this afternoon and then woke up and checked my texts. Brandon had texted me that he was on an hour break and we could talk if I wanted to. I checked the time of the text to find out that he sent it almost an hour before. I felt a little bummed that I missed the chance to talk and keep him company on his break. But he gets off work soon so we'll be able to talk tonight.

I think I'm getting a little stir crazy. Maybe I'll go swimming tomorrow...

12 days left...

Brandon and I had an amazing time skyping today. We talked about August and spending time together among other things. We had a lot of fun. I'm so excited that it's getting closer. We missed each other a lot today. I wanted to kiss him but I know that I'll have to wait since kissing the computer screen is dumb.

13 days left...

Today flew by really fast. I know that the remaining days are going to fly by fast also. Grandma talked a lot today and told me stories about her and Grandpa. It is hard for her to be moving away from this house with so many memories and away from the cemetery that Grandpa is buried in. We both know that Grandpa isn't there, he is up in heaven, but it will still be difficult for her to move away.

I'm looking forward to talking to Brandon tonight. I missed not talking to him this afternoon.

14 days left...

I'm so thankful for skype. I don't know if I could handle being apart from Brandon without it. It is so good to be able to see his face. I love his smile and looking at his eyes makes me almost feel like we aren't even apart.

Things are going well here at Grandma's. I cleaned the house a bit this morning. Then I spent the rest of the day relaxing, skyping with Brandon, watching movies and cooking/eating. It feels so good to rest this week. I'm tired out from everything going on.

Only two weeks...

15 days left...

Brandon and I have been dating for four months now. We spent some time skyping today.

Grandma is doing a lot better. She went to the doctor today and got a shot for the pain and she perked right up. I'm a little afraid that she may have overdone it with all the walking around today. So hopefully she will feel just as good or better in the morning.

16 days left...

I slept in until 8:30 this morning. I had a good time talking with Grandma throughout the day. I've been eating good which is important. Brandon and I skyped this afternoon. I'm so glad that I'm able to skype this week with him. It was good to see his face and talk. We are going to skype more tomorrow. It is our fourth month anniversary.

I'm really looking forward to Brandon coming. Mike and Andi are going to be coming to our place in August for a couple days. I know the four of us are going to have a great time together. My mother is looking forward to meeting Mike and Andi as well as seeing Brandon again.

17 days left...

Last night Grandma slept better than she has for several weeks. I'm glad that she is getting better. I did the grocery shopping and the cooking today. This afternoon I read a Mary Higgins Clark mystery book. It was the first book that I have read for a long time. It was really good to curl up with a book and finish reading it in one day.

18 days left...

First of all I want to say that I found a wireless signal at Grandma's house. I don't know how nice it is to use someone else's signal but it doesn't have a password so I can. This is going to make my week a little better.

I had a good morning at church today. Then I had an awesome drive down to Grandma's house. It took me five hours and my legs were cramping up the last two hours but otherwise it was good. I had time to reflect and think about stuff. When I arrived, Grandma said that she had a good day and was doing better. But she is still in a lot of pain. It was hard to see Grandma looking so old and using a walker. But hopefully she won't have to use it for long.

19 days left...

I had a really good day today. This morning we had a belt test in the dojo. Everyone did well and we awarded eight new belts to our students including three brown belts. Brandon and I skyped all afternoon. It was our last skype date for a while. But we are going to stay in contact over phone. This evening I went to the beach for a bonfire. It was nice and relaxing except for a swarm of hungry mesquitoes.

This is my last blog post for a while since I'm leaving for Grandma's house tomorrow.

20 days left...

The past couple days have been a little tough on me. I'm feeling a little better so I've been teaching in the dojo. It was hard for me to not spend as much time with Brandon. I didn't get to skype him yesterday but we are skyping today. There is a bunch of things going on as well. My grandma is not doing well, I'm still sick and one of our student's sister died.

My summer is getting more interesting. I am going to be spending some time with my grandma. She needs someone to stay with her for a while. I'm planning on going there on Sunday and staying as long as she needs me. It might be for a week or maybe up to two weeks. It will be nice to spend time with her and make sure she is well taken care of. The only thing is that she doesn't have internet so I will be getting another break from facebook and from blogging. But I will still make journal entries and then post them when I have the chance.

22 days left...

Another day spent at home sick. Today congestion was added onto my cough but at least my throat is not sore.

Brandon and I talked over our plans for August. We are going to be spending as much time together as possible. We plan on going swing dancing, having a bonfire, going to the beach, karate, cooking, and spending time with my family.

Our four month anniversary is next week!

23 days left...

I'm still sick. I stayed home all day relaxing, playing computer games, watching Hulu, and skyping with Brandon. I'm hoping that I'm better tomorrow because, besides skyping Brandon, I do not like staying home sick.

I don't know how married couples can be apart for long periods of time. I have a new appreciation for the women who are apart from their husbands because of work. I don't like being apart from Brandon and we are only dating. I know that it hurts Brandon to be apart especially when I'm sick. I hope I get better soon for his sake as well as mine.

24 days left...

I woke up this morning not feeling too bad so I went into the dojo to teach summer camp. By lunch time I was wiped out and my cough was worse so I stayed home for the rest of the day. Brandon and I skyped for several hours. We talked about all sorts of things and I got some stuff off my chest. I'm glad that I can share anything with him. Sometimes it is hard to let him know how I feel but it's way easier than telling anyone else. When dinner time rolled around everyone was really busy so I ended up cooking dinner. It wiped me out but I'm looking forward to eating it. Dinner should be done in a few minutes. So I have to go.

25 days left...

I decided to take it easy today and spend it resting. I watched movies, read my Bible, and even took a nap. It really helped to talk to Brandon during his lunch break and again tonight. We texted throughout the day as well. I feel well taken care of by him even though he is in another state. The thing I lack is his arms around me and his kiss goodnight. But I won't be lacking that for long.

26 days left...

I woke up this morning with a slight sore throat and a cough. I had an appointment in Brea to get fitted for my bridesmaid dress for my brother's wedding. I had thought of spending tonight at my grandparents but decided against it because I was sick. I don't need to be spreading my germs around. I drove about four hours to get down there. The dress fit almost perfectly and needed only slight alterations. It will be ready by the end of the month. I then drove back home. It was a lot of driving but I didn't mind. I listened to the radio the whole way, singing and meditating on songs. I prayed and worshiped like I always do on long car drives by myself. When there were no Christian radio stations, I listened to random stations and popular songs. I enjoy almost any type of music. I thought of Brandon constantly. I thanked God for expressing His love through Brandon as well as in all the other ways He does.

The sky was beautiful today. Some days beautiful things make me cry. Today was one of those days. It was a really good day.

27 days left...

Some days I miss him more than others. The past couple days I have missed him a lot. I'm really looking forward to August.

Brandon went hiking today. I started to wish I was hiking also but then I remembered that he was working while I was having a fun time on the 4th of July. So then I didn't mind working while he was hiking. I know that someday soon we will be hiking together. I'm looking forward to that day.

28 days left...

For some reason I was incredibly hungry today. I ate more than I have been eating. This is a good thing. I have stopped losing weight and may even gain some back if my appetite continues.

I was really missing Brandon today and wishing that he was holding me tight.

29 days left...

I'm tired tonight from my long day. I taught my mother's 7am karate class because she was sick. Then I taught summer camp and the afternoon classes by myself. I feel pretty good about how I did. I wanted to take a nap this afternoon but ended up taking my brother to his drum lesson instead. I'm looking forward to talking to Brandon and then calling it an early night to rest up for tomorrow.

I'm excited that it is less than a month until we are together again (for a short time at least.)

30 days left...

We had an awesome talk this evening. It was awesome because I was talking to Brandon. I always get sad though after we pray when it is time to say goodbye. I used to wait until he hung up but now I hang up first. It is easier for me this way.

31 days left...

I'm really exhausted right now. The weekend was fun but tiring. My cousins got sick with a cough and Abi's turned to croup. I think I may be coming down with the cough. Hopefully it is just an allergy cough and not a full blown cold or virus. I don't think getting sick right now is going to be good. I weigh 107 pounds and am afraid that I will lose more weight if I get sick. Why am I in this predicament when most of America has trouble losing weight not gaining?

I miss Brandon when I'm not feeling good. He did such a good job taking care of me last semester when I was sick. He took me to the emergency room and the doctor. He brought me food and tea and kept me company. Such love, devotion and good deeds are rare to find. I'm lucky to be dating him. God is amazing to bless me with Brandon.

32 days left...

Independence Day was amazing, fun and filled with family, friends and food. I thought about Brandon a lot and wished that I was sharing the day with him. It was awesome watching the fireworks with my little cousins. They were so excited and made me think that someday I will be watching fireworks with my own kids. I'm looking forward to that day.

The days are going by faster and faster. I think this countdown is really helping me.

33 days left...

I ended up talking to Brandon late last night for a few minutes after he got off work. It made my night complete.

I got really good news from Brandon today. He got approved for time off from his job at Border's. I'm really excited because that means I will definitely see him in 33 days. I'm so happy that I'll be in his arms then. I'm going to be working on making a schedule for the time that we will be spending together. I'm inviting all my friends to a bonfire at the beach on the Saturday after he arrives. It's going to be the best bonfire of the year!

34 days left...

I'm really exhausted after a long, busy week. I wish that tomorrow wasn't going to be so busy. Knowing that I'm getting kicked out of my bed Saturday and Sunday night isn't a nice thought. I wish that I could just enjoy sleeping in this weekend or at least have the pleasure of sleeping in my own bed. But that's what happens when you are the only girl and have a queen sized bed.

I'm a little sad tonight because Brandon is working until late and I didn't get to talk to him today. But I'll be able to talk to him tomorrow.

35 days left

Only five weeks left. After feeling all bummed out yesterday I feel better today. I was feeling all sorry for myself and thinking that summer was awful. Being apart from Brandon is not awesome but the rest of summer is awesome. God has been so good to me and I just can't be bummed out for very long.

Brandon is having a worse time than me. But he is keeping a positive attitude. I'm so glad for his example. I'm proud of him.